Over the holidays I read a letter from me to my parents, apologizing for something I did in college. In it I sounded like a blathering idiot, and I laughed. But I kept reading and soaked up words about what I had thought God’s will was for my life at that time. It had been based on what someone in my life had suggested, and it definitely wasn’t from God! It got me thinking, fascinated, about how all my life I’ve been searching for God’s will. Somehow those words have been etched in my memory from very early childhood. I don’t remember where I first heard that phrase, but I latched onto it.
Fast forward to this year, when I will be thirty-seven. I think I’ve finally gotten an inkling as to what God’s will is all about for life. And I’m ready to explore it.
Over the last few years, I’ve worked too much, yelled too much, eaten too much, drunk too much, and wasted time — too much. When I contemplate it, I realize that I really could have been doing more. Not more for more’s sake…just it’s that I haven’t prioritized time well. The examples of my squandered time seem endless. That little gnawing curiosity draws me to Facebook or Twitter. I fill hours over the week with random interweb surfing, usually for my own knowledge thirst (addiction?). Even when my kiddos are begging me to play or simply look at something they’ve done.
I’m over it.
There are too many things gnawing at me to change. I have had a feeling in my gut that I’ve blocked for too long. So I’m finally going to let go of the things I know distract me. I think it is the only way for me to focus on what I ought to be doing. In each moment of each hour of each day, to try to be like Him. To look through my eyes and really see the people around me. To savor the moments He has given me. And finally, to share His love, freely.
No change happens until there is a change of perspective. It does not wait and wonder if the the good will happen someday. It’s in the habit of seeing the good happening right now. Life is not an emergency. It’s a gift. Why race past the gift? What else are you trying to get to — the presence of God is in this present moment. -Ann Voskamp
Letting go of personal social media and … all random internet … this year, means letting God teach me … whatever that might be, I’m wide open and yearning for it.
Blessings to you this year, and always.
Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom. And we all, who with unveiled faces contemplate the Lord’s glory, are being transformed into his image with ever-increasing glory, which comes from the Lord, who is the Spirit. 2 Corinthians 3:17-18